


Far From Perfect

by FelicityGS



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Breathplay, D/s, Dom/sub, M/M, Polyamory, aromantic!Hux, asexual!Mitaka, breathplay scene, nonstandard relationships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-14
Updated: 2016-09-14
Packaged: 2018-08-15 01:13:48
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,495
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8036485
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FelicityGS/pseuds/FelicityGS
Summary: Hux knew that he could not and would not be what Mitaka needed, but Mitaka, even then, was valuable to him. He paused a moment and considered, but no one could navigate relationships so deftly as Mitaka. There was no one else Hux would be able to trust not to turn this into a scandal, later.Mitaka already knew Hux and what Hux was, and did not care. Hux was, for the moment, close enough to whatever it was Mitaka needed.





	Far From Perfect

**Author's Note:**

> Originally my first fic for this fandom was going to be a pagan!Kylo au, but instead there's this because I have a lot of feels from my impressions reading Mitaka in this fandom.
> 
> Edits 2016/9/28 for typos.

At informal dinner meetings, Mitaka likes to claim he's been with the company since Hux started it in his apartment. It's not true -- Hux did not hire Mitaka until he'd secured the lease to a proper office, two years later -- but it makes for a nice story. Hux never bothers to contradict him; when asked, he claims he does not remember. Mitaka is the head of PR, and he has allowed Hux to properly focus on his vision for the company. He is invaluable to Hux, who knows he is often cold and uncompromising to others.

Mitaka allows people to believe otherwise, with his soft smiles and gentleness. After the incident with Finn, no one believes anyone so openly warm could ever survive the four years with Hux.

Most people do not know Mitaka as well as Hux.

***  

Two years after hiring Mitaka, Hux finally encountered Mitaka outside of work. The balcony terrace was already starting to fill up--brunch would be soon, and the horse races themselves just after that. Here was Mitaka, leaned against the railing and apparently alone at his table. It was chance Hux saw him at all -- Mitaka could blend into a crowd, when he wanted -- but he did. With another, he might concern himself briefly about awkwardness at work before approaching, but thus far Mitaka had proven deft at weaving between the various spheres of his life. Hux had no reason to hesitate; he waved off the maitre d' and approached.

"Is this seat taken?" Hux asked. Mitaka looked up at him; for a moment, there was nothing on Mitaka's face, a careful schooling that Hux appreciated all the more in that moment.

Then, one of Mitaka's more private smiles that touched his eyes more than his mouth.

"Not at all."

***

After that, they would go together. Mitaka went for the food and to watch the horses, Hux for the food and tension. Mitaka only bet pittances, and never seemed to have any interest in the results, picked his bets on how he liked their appearances. Hux bet enough to be a calculated risk but not financial ruin, and allowed himself the prickle of not-quite fear when the races were close.

As Hux expected, nothing changed in their work relationship.

***

On Mitaka's birthday, Hux handed him the company card.

"What's this for?" Mitaka asked. "Is there something you shouldn't be seen purchasing?"

Hux snorted.

"It's your birthday. You have a reservation at _The Resistance_ downtown for two."

Mitaka cocked his head, a movement that still distinctly reminded Hux of a hawk.

"Who would I be going with then?" Mitaka asked, and Hux realized he had, in fact, never seen Mitaka with anyone outside of work. Granted, he typically only saw Mitaka at the races; it was a reasonable assumption that whoever Mitaka was dating, because Mitaka would be dating someone, would simply not be interested. That Mitaka was practical enough to go by himself.

"A friend," Hux said.

That smile grew, a little more, into something sharp.

"Then are you free this evening, Hux?" Mitaka asked. Hux noted the barest of flush on Mitaka's cheeks, but he did not break eye contact and for all intents seemed serious.

"I am."

"Then perhaps that would be a better gift."

Hux knew that he could not and would not be what Mitaka needed, but Mitaka, even then, was valuable to him. He paused a moment and considered, but no one could navigate relationships so deftly as Mitaka. There was no one else Hux would be able to trust not to turn this into a scandal, later.

Mitaka already knew Hux and what Hux was, and did not care. Hux was, for the moment, close enough to whatever it was Mitaka needed.

"Perhaps," Hux said. "Let me get my things."

***

Over dinner, they discussed the military history that had led to the present news circuit, their parents’ fixations on religion, and the unfortunate circumstances that led them both to prefer being addressed by their last name. Eventually they moved on to the latest season of _Knives of Ren_ , a cooking show it seemed they both indulge in for the primary host's brilliant temper and even more brilliant dishes. When they'd drunk enough to feel the first liquid warmth blooming in their veins, Mitaka showed Hux his Instagram; Hux was immediately impressed by the personality that Mitaka had curated, and said as much. Mitaka preened, and leaned closer, and his heat had Hux ordering more whiskey and watching Mitaka's pulse at his throat.

They ended up at Hux's apartment, which was closer, both drunk in a way that made everything feel like a dream Hux once had. Hux stumbled over the entryway after Mitaka; Mitaka fumbled for him, and ended up between Hux and the wall, a small laugh shuddering through him that reminded Hux of how very real and _warm_ Mitaka was. Mitaka's eyes, pupils still adjusting to the low light of the entry, were very bright, and his lips very pale.

Hux kissed him, and Mitaka opened beneath him with a sigh, hands gripping tight to Hux's jacket.

Mitaka responded well to soft touches and sharper pain, tensed and relaxed as Hux finally allowed himself to dig his teeth into Mitaka's throat and feel that pulse on his tongue; shivered and went doe-eyed when Hux pulled his hair and then released. Mitaka's hands, even drunk, didn't fumble with the buttons of Hux's shirt as they stumbled their way towards Hux's bed, or when they slid into Hux's pants. Mitaka fell easy into Hux's bed, hand warm around Hux.

"No," Mitaka murmured sleepy against Hux's neck, after, when Hux reached for him to return the favour and found him still only half-hard. Hux settled his hand instead on Mitaka's hip and Mitaka's eyelashes brushed soft against his throat. Hux allowed himself to drift a bit, then crawled over Mitaka to go clean off and drink a glass of water so the hangover in the morning wouldn't be as sour.

He came back with water to find Mitaka curled around a pillow, on his side. Not asleep, not yet; Mitaka rolled over as he heard Hux and blinked himself more aware. "Ah," Mitaka said, a soft animal noise, and pushed himself to sitting. He ran a hand through mussed hair, took the water. Once he finished it, he handed it back to Hux.

"I should go," Mitaka said, practical and without a hint of self-pity. Hux looked at him, considered how it wasn't the sex that Mitaka followed him home for, and realized at last what it was he is good enough for, for now.

"Stay," Hux said, "and I'll drive you home in the morning."

Mitaka hesitated. Hux raised an eyebrow. "Dopheld. Stay. I'll get another glass of water."

It had been a long time since Hux had someone in his bed, and he knew this was only for tonight. Mitaka's body heat was just right, not so hot that Hux wanted to shove him out of the bed, but not so cold it jerked him to full awareness again; a heat that Hux could take animal comfort in. Hux settled behind Mitaka and counted the space between his breaths until they both fell asleep.

In the morning, Hux drove him home.

***

They continued meeting outside of work--horse races and dinner and sometimes art films at Hux's place. Mitaka slipped between all the different aspects of himself without issue, and let himself be the body that Hux wanted to bury himself in. In return, Hux softened himself, just enough, to allow Mitaka to linger after and take whatever cravings for touch the other had.

Hux knew how much pain to apply, the ways that Mitaka would unravel when there was more than one source, how to settle his hand on the hollow of Mitaka's throat so that Mitaka would breathe in, once, and blink slowly before pressing forward anyway to choke himself. Knew how to recognize when Mitaka craved touch, and knew how to manipulate himself so he could provide it, the least of things Hux could do because Hux would never be able to shape himself fully into what it was Mitaka needed to keep from breaking entirely under his own fine control.

It was far from perfect, and ill-defined, but it was theirs and it was, for a time, enough.

***

It was Mitaka, six months after they started to sleep together, who introduced him to Kylo--Ben, when he wasn't on TV, but he would always be Kylo to Hux, and Hux suspected that Ben would rather be Kylo all the time anyway.

"What's Mitaka to you?" Kylo asked, once, both of them still panting and Hux's back leaking blood.

"Is he an issue?" Hux asked in return instead of answering.

"Are you a package deal? You're fucking, I saw his toothbrush in the bathroom and his clothes in your closet."

"You're a brat."

"What's he to you?"

"Not you," Hux said, then, "but I don't come without him. If he needs me, then he does."

Kylo had frowned at him, a pout.

"So what is he?"

"Asexual," Hux said. "But if he needs touch, or even more rarely a fuck, then I won't tell him no."

Kylo looked at Hux. Hux looked back and did not allow himself to feel as if he had exposed a secret weakness, though he knew in some ways he had.

"Fine, whatever you have to do."

***

Kylo and Hux proceeded to get along like fire and fuel. Hux was never sure who was which, but he supposed the roles likely changed, because with Kylo he approached something nearly stable. Hux suspected, as well, that Mitaka had known as much would happen.

***

Four months after Hux and Kylo became a _relationship_ , public and commodified, Mitaka spun their 'romance' into something that might, in fact, approximate a romance and made Hux look more human than ever. After an interview Hux would rather not have given, Mitaka drags him to a bar, the first they went to, the one they go back to, a heavy gravity to him that Hux found impossible to escape.

"Let's go to your place," Mitaka had said, whiskey making his mouth hot against Hux's. "A movie."

Later, Mitaka was on his knees between Hux's legs, swallowing Hux down and hands hot against Hux's thighs. One of Hux's hands was reflexively tightening then loosening in Mitaka's hair, his eyes half glazed as he tracked the actors on the screen but not what they were saying, not what they were doing.

Hux pulled Mitaka up before he orgasmed, slotting them together. Mitaka's hands were deft pulling the condom off Hux, and he moaned into Hux's mouth as Hux pulled his hips forward--friction, soft, the best compromise Hux knew of for them, the fission of heat and warmth and flesh as he dug his fingers into Mitaka's skin and bit his lips bright red.

After, Hux's release sticky and drying to his skin and Mitaka's clothes, Mitaka shook his head slightly.

"A mess," Mitaka murmured with a smile; Hux breathed the words in, forehead still pressed to Mitaka's.

"Yes," Hux said, and knew it wasn't the come and sweat drying on them to which Mitaka was referring.

Mitaka didn't say anything else about it; they went to bed not long after, Mitaka's body heat still just right, perhaps more so now Hux had Kylo’s furnace heat for comparison.

"Thank you," Mitaka said in the morning, after Hux drove him home like he always did after these evenings together.

"Anytime," Hux said; Mitaka knew that meant when Hux could, and not, in fact, any time.

Mitaka had smiled at him--small, more in his eyes than his mouth, then gotten out of the car.

***

As suddenly as they had started to sleep together, they stopped after that night. Nothing else changed; Mitaka was still efficient and perfect at work, still able to make a room full of people believe that Hux cared anything for what they thought, for more beyond those Hux viewed as his. They still went to horse races, to bars, and sometimes Mitaka even managed to make it through an entire film before excusing himself home.

They simply stopped ending up in Hux's bed.

"You just stopped?" Kylo asked, disbelieving. Hux, familiar with Kylo's past, knew that he'd never stopped seeing someone without an explosion of drama that was neatly swept under the rug by having a stage name.

"We are both adults," Hux said, adjusting his tie.

"You can't just stop."

"Pretend it was friends with benefits, if that suits you," Hux said; Kylo asked endlessly about his relationship with Mitaka, and Hux had found there was no explaining the _just enough_ of what they were to him.

"But you're still friends."

"And, should he require them, there will still be benefits."

Hux didn't wait for Kylo to reply; there was a knife edge to his words that he knew would only cause a fight if he stayed. Kylo did not want him kind, but it did not change how easily Hux could wound him.

***

Mitaka was not in the office. When Hux checked Mitaka's schedule, he found that Mitaka would not be in the office, a crisp and professional _PTO_ blocked off for the day.

Getting coffee, he found Phasma.

"Where is Mitaka?" he asked.

"One year anniversary," Phasma said, careless and clearly aware that Hux did not know. "Matthew O'Donnell."

The name sounded vaguely familiar.

"You met him last week at the trade show. We're using the parts his company manufactures now." Phasma was smiling, a slight crinkle.

Ah. A name to match with the face--red hair, a few shades darker than Hux's own, roughly the same height. O'Donnell had looked older than Hux, and he had had a firm handshake. They had discussed their respective brief stints in the military as officers, at one point.

"What is he like?" Hux asked.

"You, but human." Phasma laughed. "Mitaka has a type." Then, because Phasma was rough but not unkind, "He's good enough for our poster boy."

"Good," Hux said.

He took his coffee back to his office, set it down, and opened Mitaka's Instagram on his phone--if O'Donnell was good enough, then he would fit well with the persona that Mitaka displayed for the public. If he wasn't, then perhaps Hux would need to do for Mitaka what Mitaka had done for him with Kylo.

O'Donnell--Matthew, he wasn't the sort who needed to go by his last name, that was clear in moments--did fit well. Even fit beautifully, soft kisses and dinner dates and touches intimate but sexless, everything filtered and edited by Mitaka's deft hand; everything that _poppyfields_ ' Instagram was already about, a touch of real that was all Mitaka's, selectively displayed.

It was, perhaps, the closest Hux had come to seeing Mitaka preen publicly.

 _Good_ , he thought, and called the florist.


End file.
